My mind keeps replaying what my heart needs to heal And if I shed tears it's like I'm paying debt for my grief I waited so long for the future that it left me with no one in mine And now there's a four letter word I'd love to forget And it's not love or hate or numb or pain It's your name I held you close even when I had no space for you at all Until I was suffocating you in May of 2022 And I might meet someone that gives me a reason to love again But until then I’ll learn to love myself and not you I learned about softness when you brought it out of me by pouring my morning coffee And I learned about love When you anticipated all the little things that would make me happy And I can't negotiate with life anyway but If it takes half the time that I loved you to forget you then I think it's an honest price to pay Cause I loved the way it felt to wake up to next to you But I've learned to love the way it feels to wake up next to no one Cause with pain comes perspective and perspective comes from tragedy So every time it hurts I just think about how much better the story will be So thank you You gave all the pain left over some where to go