I'm Sorry (You're Welcome)

录音室版 · 1446134400000

I'm Sorry (You're Welcome)

01

1

Introduction, A Gift From Derrick

Eugene Mirman

3 min 31 sec

2

Some Jokes That Have To Do With My Girlfriend, A Hotel In Boston, A Man In Provincetown, Twitter, Time Vs. Timing, A Neck Pillow

Eugene Mirman

5 min

3

Sub Pop Showcase At SxSW

Eugene Mirman

1 min 56 sec

4

Eugene Mirman

3 min 3 sec

5

Some Jokes That Touch Upon Religion, Guitar Center

Eugene Mirman

3 min 4 sec

6

A LinkedIn Profile

Eugene Mirman

2 min 39 sec

7

The Time I Was Mugged In Mexico With Michael Stipe

Eugene Mirman

5 min 48 sec

8

Girlfriend, Khaleesi, Any Questions, Making A ‘Zine

Eugene Mirman

3 min 50 sec

9

Contacting Celebrities On Facebook

Eugene Mirman

4 min 18 sec

10

Not Happy With A Parking Ticket I Got In Portsmouth, NH

Eugene Mirman

7 min 59 sec

11

Paintings I Made To Showcase At My Local Whole Foods

Eugene Mirman

2 min 29 sec

12

I Marry A Couple From The Audience On Stage

Eugene Mirman

7 min 5 sec

02

1

Welcome To The Meditation, Please Get Comfortable

Eugene Mirman

3 min 22 sec

2

Eugene Mirman

2 min 26 sec

3

Eugene Mirman

1 min 55 sec

4

Tummy, Doodle & Hoo-Hoo

Eugene Mirman

2 min 54 sec

5

Eugene Mirman

2 min 54 sec

6

Throat, Arms & Hands

Eugene Mirman

2 min 41 sec

7

Eugene Mirman

1 min 51 sec

8

Thank You Body, Simple Ways To Relax

Eugene Mirman

3 min 14 sec

03

1

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

2

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

3

Horse Galloping

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

4

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

5

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

6

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

7

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

8

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

9

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

10

Cat Asking For Directions

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

11

Two Sheep Arguing

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

12

Mice Making Fried Rice

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

13

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

14

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

15

Fox Embarrassed About His Boner

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

16

Giraffe Sleeping

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

17

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

18

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

19

Chicken Prostitute Haggling

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

20

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

21

Toilet Flushing

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

22

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

23

Automatic Door Opening

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

24

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

25

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

26

Frying Pan Sizzle

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

27

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

28

Dishwasher Running

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

29

Telephone Ringing

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

30

Telephone Falling On The Ground

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

31

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

32

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

33

VCR Ejecting A Tape

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

34

Group Of Businessmen Agreeing

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

35

Baby Locked In A Dresser

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

36

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

37

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

38

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

39

Little Girl Crying

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

40

Man Walking In Boots

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

41

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

42

Screaming Woman Who Sounds Like A Man

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

43

TV Audience Clapping At Food

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

44

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

45

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

46

Last Guy At A Rave

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

47

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

48

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

49

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

50

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

51

Scanning An Item

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

52

Feeling For A Ripe Avocado

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

53

Jihadist After Seeing About A Boy

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

54

Jack-In-The-Box

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

55

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

56

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

57

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

58

Italian Person Eating a Pizza Pie

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

59

Naturalized Immigrant Doing A Job You Are Unqualified For

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

60

Abortion Doctor Enjoying A Candy Bar

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

61

Grand Wizard Can’t Find A Sock

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

62

Powerful Senator

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

63

Powerful Senator II

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

64

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

65

Ambient Noise In An Airplane

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

66

Airplane Flying

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

67

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

68

Police Siren In Europe

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

69

Police Siren In Belgium

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

70

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

71

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

72

.357 Magnum Inside A Watermelon

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

73

Gays In The Military

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

74

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

75

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

76

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

77

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

78

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

79

Sentient Robot Going About His Daily Business

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

80

Computer Downloading A File

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

81

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

82

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

83

Kids Playing In The Park

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

84

Kids Playing In The Park II

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

85

Spaceship Flying

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

86

Spaceship Crashing

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

87

Going To Warp Speed

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

88

Alien Supermarket

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

89

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

90

Someone Controlling Technology By Waving Their Hands

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

91

Ronald Reagan Taking A Shower

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

92

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

93

Fur Coat Getting ****** By A Bunch Of Cats

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

94

Tree Falling In A Forest

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

95

Jewish Person Saying “Oy Vey” Wrong

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

96

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

97

People Being Diligent At An Ad Agency

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

98

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

99

Living Helicopter Complaining

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

100

Chinese Woman Eating Lasagna

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

101

Hero Returning From A Budweiser Commercial

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

102

Elephant Having Trouble

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

103

One Of Those People On The Street Who Tries To Get Money

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

104

Telephone Calling A Toaster

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

105

Grasshopper Asking A Dog A Question

Eugene Mirman

15 sec

106

Shortwave Radio

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

107

Two Apples On A Rainy Sunday In The Fall

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

108

Dentist Having ***

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

109

Panda At A Hotel

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

110

Birth Control Pills Telling A Little Boy Not To Eat Them

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

111

Cat That Doesn’t Mind

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

112

Male Toothpaste Being Sneaky

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

113

Creamy Polenta Vs. Couscous

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

114

Old Man’s *****

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

115

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

116

Museum That Needs To Use The Bathroom

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

117

Celebrity Agreeing To Take A Selfie

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

118

Guy Getting A Sweet Beej

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

119

Fire Hydrant That Doesn’t Want Anyone To Know It’s Anti-Semitic

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

120

Bellhop Who Got Stung

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

121

LGBT Party Where People Are Eating Sushi

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

122

LGBT Newsletter That Loves The Expendables Franchise

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

123

Sweaty Kid Crying About A Sandwich

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

124

Too Many Pieces Of Paper

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

125

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

126

Magic Clown Using His Powers

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

127

Wild Turkey Bragging About His Mansion

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

128

The Number 84 Explaining To The Number 52 That It Is Bigger But Not Better

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

129

Tape Recorder Being Used Wrong

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

130

Misogynistic Maple Trees

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

131

Apple Sauce Being Naughty

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

132

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

133

Two Pistols Sitting On A Shelf

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

134

Cookies Being Arrested

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

135

Sheep That Is Too Cute To Eat

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

136

Daughter Reacting To Her Mother Telling Her There Are Two Kinds Of People In This World

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

137

Desk Covered In Hair

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

138

Person From 1870 Who Was Frozen In Time

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

139

Boy Who Loves Hammocks

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

140

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

141

A Billion Ants Writing A Complaint Letter

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

142

Two 20-Year-Olds Touching Their Winkies

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

143

Yellow Line That Divides Roads

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

144

Smell Of A Pear

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

145

Group Of Wealthy Men

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

146

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

147

25 Rats Sleeping

Eugene Mirman

23 sec

148

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

149

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

150

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

151

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

152

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

153

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

154

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

155

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

156

Telescope Being Defensive

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

157

Larry King Being Told Important Information

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

158

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

159

The Moment A Well-Respected Author Wins The Guinness World Record

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

160

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

161

Little Girl Teasing A Lamp

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

162

Zoo With Nothing To Lose

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

163

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

164

Friendship Bracelet

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

165

Thor’s Hammer, Mjölnir

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

166

Two Lost Fireflies

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

167

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

168

Elevator At The Empire State Building

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

169

Tip Of A Billionaire’s *****

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

170

Brand New Pillows Covered In Blood

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

171

French Kids Picking Apples

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

172

Huge Pile Of Dirty Shirts

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

173

Hotel Guest Falling Asleep Frustrated

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

174

RomneyCare & ObamaCare

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

175

The Nerve Of Some People

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

176

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

177

Spilled Milk That Found Out Its Son Died In A Car Accident

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

178

A BuzzFeed List

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

179

Two College Kids Subtly Trying To Figure Out Which One Is More Disadvantaged

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

180

Fox News & MSNBC

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

181

Amicable Divorce

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

182

Bing-Bong Ding-Dong Playing With Boom-Boom Doom-Doom

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

183

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

184

Telecommuting Cat

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

185

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

186

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

187

Caldor Binge Drinking

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

188

Gender Roles On Their Way To A Football Game

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

189

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

190

School Teacher Given Permission

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

191

High School Hockey Team Seeing 20 Years Into The Future

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

192

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

193

Anna Kendrick Discovering An Underwater City

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

194

The Czech Republic

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

195

Drug Lord Feels Pretty Bad

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

196

Hotel Bed That Is Tired

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

197

Warm Handmade Boiled Bagels

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

198

Silly Billy Goat Got A ****** Addiction

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

04

1

A Medically Reliable Introduction To Digital Drugs

Eugene Mirman

25 sec

2

Eugene Mirman

3 min

3

Eugene Mirman

3 min

4

Eugene Mirman

3 min

5

Apple Cider Vinegar

Eugene Mirman

3 min

6

Eugene Mirman

3 min

7

Eugene Mirman

3 min

8

Eugene Mirman

3 min

9

Eugene Mirman

3 min

10

Eugene Mirman

3 min

11

Eugene Mirman

3 min

05

1

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

2

Eugene Mirman

1 min 32 sec

3

Eugene Mirman

17 min 51 sec

4

I Simply Keep Crying

Eugene Mirman

25 min 35 sec

06

1

Welcome To My Russian Audio Phrasebook

Eugene Mirman

36 sec

2

Common Statements & Questions For Everyday Situations

Eugene Mirman

1 min 57 sec

3

Conversational Russian In The Workplace

Eugene Mirman

2 min 17 sec

4

Casual Phrases For Parties, Pubs & Outings

Eugene Mirman

2 min 38 sec

5

Proper Dinner Conversation For The Educated Guest

Eugene Mirman

2 min 59 sec

6

Small Talk With Strangers & Acquaintances in Public Spaces

Eugene Mirman

3 min

7

Useful Phrases While On Vacation In Russia

Eugene Mirman

2 min 49 sec

8

Commonplace Subjects Within The Rich World of Academia

Eugene Mirman

2 min 39 sec

9

Polite Ways To Engage People of High Status

Eugene Mirman

3 min 15 sec

07

1

Enter The *********

Eugene Mirman

3 min 7 sec

2

Take A Ride On The Poon Schooner

Eugene Mirman

3 min 19 sec

3

I’m A Dirty Little Foreign Advisor

Eugene Mirman

3 min 32 sec

4

I Thought I Was The Pancake Man

Eugene Mirman

3 min 46 sec

5

You’re A World-Class *****-Grifter

Eugene Mirman

8 min 18 sec

08

1

Intro To Ringtones

Eugene Mirman

28 sec

2

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

3

Vibrate Vibrate Vibrate

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

4

Ding-Dong Doodly-Doo

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

5

Waterfalls Shrimp Shrimp

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

6

Fiddle-Doddle-Doodle-Deedle

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

7

Doo-Doo-Pa-Dee-Da-Da-Pada

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

8

Phone Is Ringing

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

9

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

10

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

11

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

12

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

13

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

14

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

15

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

16

Zippa-Dee-Doo-Da Zippa-Dee-Da

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

17

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

18

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

19

Husband Calling

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

20

Someone Is Calling

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

21

******** Calling

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

22

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

23

Eugene Mirman

15 sec

24

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

25

Wouowowoooouuuooo

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

26

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

27

Trtrtrtrtrtrtrllllbbrrr

Eugene Mirman

17 sec

28

Vrrrvvvvvvvvvvbbbrrr

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

29

Hyeuueehuuyehyeheyehyeyeeuu

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

30

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

31

Hrrruuhrrrunnghruu

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

32

Hraaaa! Hraavlaa!

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

33

Luuuuleelaaalalou!!

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

34

Unnngnhhhnhnhnuua

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

35

Answer The Phone

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

36

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

37

Susan Sarandon Is Calling

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

38

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

39

Doodle-Doodle Hoo-Hoo

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

40

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

41

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

42

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

43

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

44

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

45

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

46

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

47

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

48

I Can’t Answer The Phone

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

49

Intro To Outgoing Voicemail Messages

Eugene Mirman

1 min 8 sec

50

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

51

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

52

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

53

The Sizzle-Maker

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

54

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

55

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

56

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

57

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

58

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

59

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

60

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

61

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

62

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

63

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

64

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

65

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

66

Leave Your Name

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

67

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

68

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

69

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

70

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

71

Penicillin Dong

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

72

Thong McHacky-Sack

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

73

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

74

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

75

Confident Balls

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

76

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

77

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

78

Pile Of Sneakers

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

79

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

80

Crème Fresh Jackson

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

81

I Can’t Answer The Phone 2

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

82

Flitchy Woo-Woo

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

83

Slick ************

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

84

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

85

Can’t Come To Phone

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

86

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

87

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

88

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

89

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

90

Hello, Mr. Cunt

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

91

Standard Greeting 1

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

92

Standard Greeting 2

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

93

Standard Greeting 3

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

94

Standard Greeting 4

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

95

Standard Greeting 5

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

96

Standard Greeting 6

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

97

Standard Greeting 7

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

98

I Can’t Answer The Phone (But I Want To)

Eugene Mirman

2 min 15 sec

09

1

Please Take Off Your Shoes

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

2

Don Draper Has The Flu

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

3

Moons Over Your Hammy

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

4

It’s Not A Slumber Party Without Thor

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

5

Now My Back Hurts

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

6

Thank You So, So Much Mandy Patinkin

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

7

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

8

Sneaking Around The Zoo

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

9

Goodnight, Buddy

Eugene Mirman

17 sec

10

Baba Yaga Already Said She Was Sorry

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

11

Faxed To The Wrong Number

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

12

Linda Ronstadt Chillaxing

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

13

1960’s Street Fight

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

14

Seriously Bro, You Just Made Me Goosh… Thanks

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

15

You Can Call Me Al (Not Song)

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

16

Don’t Worry, This Man-Nanny Can Keep A Secret

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

17

The Best Misunderstanding

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

18

Whoa… Lookout, Sir Beast-Weasel

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

19

Kindhearted Fireman

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

20

Let’s Put Our Intellectual Property Debate On Hold

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

21

Happy Valentine’s Day, Mr. And Mrs. President

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

22

Ice Cream Hearts Melting In The Love-Sun

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

23

Offal For Lunch, Woo-Hoo For Dinner

Eugene Mirman

24 sec

24

Goofballs Having Silly Fun

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

25

The Jackal Never Misses!

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

26

Land-Grabber’s Cousin Has Nice Upstairs

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

27

Mrs. Thunder/Mr. 80% Chance Of Rain

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

28

Don’t Mind If I Do…

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

29

Round One Goes To Princess-Rump

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

30

Happy And Stuffed

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

31

Just Another Guns N’ Roses Brunch

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

32

Pleasant Surprise At Sleepaway Camp

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

33

Handsome Old Man Has A Tummy Ache

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

34

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

35

No, Please… After You

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

36

Gimme Back My Bonnie Raitt CD… Actually, Keep It

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

37

Tollbooth Attendant Is Open-Minded

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

38

88% On Rotten Tomatoes

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

39

Mischievous Whoopsy-Daisy

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

40

Two Rascals Showing Off

Eugene Mirman

28 sec

41

48 And Flexible

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

42

That Was Worth It

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

43

Bandits Helping Around The House

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

44

Army Buddies Going Big-Ball Bowling

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

45

I’m The Autodidact Of Amour

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

46

Oh, My Wife Knows

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

47

That Was The Best FTP I Ever Uploaded

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

48

The Healing Heart/Mother-In-Law

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

49

Just Two Doves At A Sweat Party

Eugene Mirman

19 sec

50

We Get Five Weeks’ Vacation In Holland

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

51

Young Man Is An Excellent Executive Administrative Assistant

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

52

Two Adults In A Small Space

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

53

Dude, We’re On The 5 O’Clock News

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

54

www.thepleasuresallmine.gov

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

55

I Don’t Have The Hiccups Anymore

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

56

Thank You For Allowing Me Access To Your Oven

Eugene Mirman

15 sec

57

These Goat-Like People Know Their Bodies!

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

58

Bill Clinton Is Still Quite Playful

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

59

I Could Sure Use A Glass Of Water Now

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

60

The Kindness Of Strangers

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

61

We’re Registered At Bed, Bath & Behind

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

62

IT Department Doesn’t Have A Care In The World

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

63

Brassy, Bald And Ejaculating

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

64

I Voted For McCain In 2000

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

65

New Car Smell, Old Car Feel

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

66

Paul Can Really Push Good

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

67

Stay In My Guest Room As Long As You Want

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

68

David And Joshua Mutual Pleasure Exchange

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

69

Doin’ The Flip-A-Doo

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

70

Anti-Vaxxer “Saxophone” Relaxer

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

71

Germaphobe Does Not Mind

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

72

Very Sleepy Man Delivers On Promise

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

73

Fourscore And Seven Years Of Happy-Happy

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

74

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

75

French Woman Enjoying A Danish

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

76

No Shirt, No Shoes — Service

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

77

With Or Without You (Preferably With)

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

78

Shouts And Murmurs

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

79

Pilates Are Invigorating

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

80

I'll Take A Look At The Dessert Menu

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

81

The Last Rock Star

Eugene Mirman

20 sec

82

It's Noon Somewhere

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

83

My Bar Mitzvah Was Ten Years Ago

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

84

Community Bookstore Meet-Up Gone Good

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

85

Love Clean Up, Aisle One

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

86

Found Your Thing Using MapQuest

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

87

Divorced MILF At A Used Record Store

Eugene Mirman

15 sec

88

This Cheesecake Is Divine

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

89

Eugene Mirman

16 sec

90

Can't Find My Socks (Don't Want To)

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

91

Even Better Than An Associate Degree

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

92

I Went To School In The Boston Area

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

93

Square Hole, Triangle Peg, Plus Another Square Hole

Eugene Mirman

20 sec

94

Call Me Dr. Stardust

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

95

Now That's How A Puppy Should Sneeze

Eugene Mirman

23 sec

96

Fun Times Inside A Grain Elevator

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

97

Operation Cooch-Toot

Eugene Mirman

17 sec

98

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

99

My Parents Won't Be Home For A Year And Five Days

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

100

Sure, In There Is Fine

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

101

The Official Webcam Of Yugoslavia

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

102

Last Entry Is At Three, But You Can Stay Til Six(!)

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

103

Bridesmaid Cutting Loose At The Governor Bradford

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

104

We Deserve A Michelin Star

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

105

Mr. Mamet Showing Off His Special Forces

Eugene Mirman

21 sec

106

Soup Dumplings, Squish-Squish

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

107

How Very Hemmingway Of You

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

108

Drinking Straight Out Of Lust’s Milk Carton

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

109

I Wonder If This Was Allowed In Prussia?

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

110

Pretty Fun Night In Merrill C3 Short

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

111

Should We Take The Bridge Or The Tunnel?

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

112

Dirty Boulevard

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

113

The Wish-Maker Will See You Now

Eugene Mirman

17 sec

114

Head Of Development Instructing Rugged Hiker

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

115

The Shenanigans You Requested

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

116

Please Don’t Make This About Harold Pinter (Again)

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

117

A Gentleman Never Reveals His Source

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

118

Glad The Town Approved Your Slurping Permit

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

119

A Mime Betrayed, A Mime Forgiven

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

120

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

121

Please Be Quiet Or You’ll Wake Up My Titties

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

122

She Got A Real Candy Apple Poot-Hooter

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

123

Dolph Lundgren At That Top Of His Game

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

124

Mustachioed Man Has Patience, Diligence

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

125

Two Gigolos, One Office Manager

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

126

Secretary Of State Is Not Off-Putting

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

127

It Took Another Man’s Wife To Make This Boy A Man

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

128

Nothing Goes To Waste

Eugene Mirman

18 sec

129

My Mouse Is Thankful For Your Mouse

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

130

Make Yourself At Home

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

131

Meet Me By The Condom Machine

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

132

I Feel Like I’ve Known You For Hours

Eugene Mirman

13 sec

133

Postwar Japan Is Well-Understood By These Two

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

134

Gene Simmons Crying In A Pile Of ****

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

135

I’m The Only Lady Who Could Pull Excalibur Outta There

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

136

Rooting For Truffles, Miami Style

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

137

Businessman Has Ding-Dong Like Rocket Ship

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

138

Sally’s In Charge

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

139

It’s Raining Dan

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

140

It’s Like Apples And Oranges (*******)

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

141

College Is Exactly What I Was Hoping It’d Be

Eugene Mirman

20 sec

142

Mentally Ill Farmer Is Finally Getting Help

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

143

A Swedish Couple Enjoying Hearty Vegetables

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

144

Vulnerable Oligarch Vulnerably Sexting

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

145

Best Friends/Next Level

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

146

Tooth Fairy Is Quite Real

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

147

Civil Disobedience Met With Heartfelt Understanding

Eugene Mirman

14 sec

148

A Textbook Case Of Level-12 Pleasure

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

149

So Glad That Was You Behind Me

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

150

An Astoundingly Honest And Fun Salesman

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

151

Celebrating My Promotion With My Wife And Some Dude

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

152

Crammin’ For The Jam Exam

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

153

I’m Glad We Waited Til Dusk

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

154

You Are As Powerful And Detail-Oriented As A River, Sir

Eugene Mirman

4 sec

155

You’re Like John Adams Times 1.5!

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

156

Babysitter Surprisingly Into Divorced Software Engineer

Eugene Mirman

9 sec

157

I Guess We’ll Need A New Kitchen

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

158

Guilty Catholics Have To Marry Each Other

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

159

They Call Me The “You’re Welcome Man”

Eugene Mirman

30 sec

160

Let’s Get Your Mind Off Of The Dust Bowl

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

161

So Relieved We Found This Abandoned Schoolhouse

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

162

File Under “The Rolling Stones”

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

163

No Need To Explain Your Clean Aqueduct

Eugene Mirman

11 sec

164

My Poon-Noodles Are Your Doon-Poodles

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

165

Two-State Solution With Benefits

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

166

My Skill Set Qualifies Me For This Position

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

167

Can’t Tell If This Is *** Or Hockey

Eugene Mirman

12 sec

168

Have The Report On My **** In The Morning

Eugene Mirman

5 sec

169

So This Is Medicaid?

Eugene Mirman

7 sec

170

Mature Cougar Is Addicted To Beej Pie

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

171

Abe Lincoln (Not That One) Is Ready For Fatherhood

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

172

Sure, You Can Use The Cat Door

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

173

PTA Meeting Is Full Of Joy And Wonder

Eugene Mirman

6 sec

174

Oh Peter, Thank You For The Yard Work

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

175

Horace’s Compromise

Eugene Mirman

10 sec

176

Plutocrats Got Feelings Too

Eugene Mirman

8 sec

My Butt Has a Fever

Bob's Burgers , Dan Mintz , Kristen Schaal , Eugene Mirman
How Do You Lie to Your Child About Santa (feat. Lucy Wainwright Roche)

1669824000000
How Do You Lie to Your Child About Santa

1669824000000
Toymageddon (feat. Ira Glass & Eugene Mirman)

Yo La Tengo , Ira Glass , Eugene Mirman
An Evening of Comedy in a Fake Underground Laboratory

1359993600000
An Evening Of Comedy In A Fake, Underground Laboratory

1359993600000
God Is A Twelve-Year-Old Boy With Asperger’s

1254758400000